Florida Georgia Line Goes Full-Blown Mumford on “Simple,” & It’s Hilarious
AHHAHAHHHAAHHHAAHA!
HAHA!
Ha!
Oh man…
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Ragingly relevant to 2012, the latest Florida Georgia Line reboot goes full-blown Mumford & Sons on our asses as part of their big, multi-year rehabilitation campaign to save their skins from certain doom as a laughing stock of country music history. And when I say Mumford and Sons, I’m talking about the whole damn motif in lock step with the textbook stereotypical definition ripped straight out on Merriam Webster, with whistles, hand claps, banjos, suspenders, vests, and bowties, like you’re trying to get laid at your liberal arts college during the first term of the Obama Administration by playing “Wagon Wheel” in an old time string band.
Oh this is so deliciously bad and hilarious. It’s like a blessed gift of comedy to get you through an otherwise crappy week. The direction Florida Georgia Line is attempting to go here would almost be admirable if it wasn’t so incredibly transparent at what is transpiring here, and half a decade too late. Saddled more than any other stage act with the anchor of the “Bro-Country” label—and admonished by the major country music awards and many of their own peers for being the preeminent producer of vapid pap for the last five or six years—“Simple” is the latest stab by the duo to stay afloat in an ever-changing world where Florida Georgia Line is becoming more clearly defined as the flash in the pan we always knew they always were, and the sacrificial lamb for all of Bro-Country’s sins over the last half decade.
This is not a similar moment to when the duo shocked, and frankly impressed when the lead single from their second record Anything Goes was offered to the public in the form of “Dirt.” What worked about that song was it still nestled into what Florida Georgia Line was, as shallow as they may have seemed. “Dirt” exuded substance and delivered storytelling as opposed to the doltish mush-mouth refuse that defined their earlier singles. It was Florida Georgia Line being the best they could be.
“Simple” however is so incredibly hokey and pandering, it’s impossible to take seriously. You can almost hear the duo saying to themselves, “Well, what do all those east Nashville hipsters like? They like banjos and suspenders and shit. So let’s do that.” But even in that estimation they’re incredibly wrong. East Nashville has moved on to jean jackets, cocaine mustaches, spending $600 on rhinestone coats at Nikki Lane’s vintage shop and purposely making their records sound like shit so they can be like Margo Price. Mumford & Sons had become pariahs by the time FGL’s “Cruise” was setting its all-time records on the Billboard charts in 2013, so much so that even Mumford & Sons has moved on from the sound and are now trying to fill mid-sized venues by playing alt rock.
But let’s not let the reactionary bile that comes boiling up through the esophagus at the mere mention of the name “Florida Georgia Line” cloud our judgement upon the merits of “Simple.” As a song divested from the history of this duo or the timeline of relevancy, it’s fine. It’s incredibly harmless, a shift in the positive from Florida Georgia Line’s low standards, and yes, rootsy and organic. None of this makes it good mind you. The lyrics are inane and mindless stock, but hey, at least their annunciations are within the vernacular of the English language for once. “Simple” will probably knock some much worse song on the radio down a notch. It’s just good enough to be very slightly better than the median of the mainstream at the moment. So whatever. Don away your paperboy hats and guit-jo’s you dweebs, and do your best Dom Flemons impression while your careers still have a last dying gasp.
And don’t mistake this for some dramatic swing in direction from the Florida Georgia Line duo. We weren’t fooled with “Dirt” back in 2014, and we shouldn’t be fooled here. Their new record will likely still be the same fatuous crud. Or maybe it won’t be, and that might make it even worse. Because as bad as Florida Georgia Line is, they should still follow the same cardinal rule of all artists: be who you are at all costs. For Florida Georgia Line, that very well may be a product of a short-lived era that will be relegated to doing nostalgia shows 20 years from now. But shit, they’re loaded and are set for life. Own it. Keep riding that gravy train until it gives out. Trying to act like you’re the second coming of the Lumineers is just embarrassing on so many levels, even if it results in some inadvertent entertainment for naysayers.
As lame and outdated as “Simple” is, it’s biggest sin is not being true to what Florida Georgia Line is. Even the most hardened critic must admit to the catchy nature of a song like “Cruise.” Florida Georgia Line is really good at being really bad. Here, they’re bad at trying to be good. Yes, “Simple” is not where we should be training our anger. It’s innocuous. But it’s also not what Florida Georgia Line should be focusing on either. Because ultimately, it’s just not them.
Brandon F
June 1, 2018 @ 9:39 am
If they didn’t use so much auto-tune and constantly recite “S-I-M-P-L-E simple” like a damn spelling bee it wouldn’t be so bad. The other song “Colorado” is better. Still not great, but at least it is better than what they have put out in the past. They turned down the arena rock guitars on these which is nice.
Shaun Benedum
January 20, 2019 @ 4:02 am
I like the song i think it is romantic. Dont you people have anything else beyter to do than talk down on people. Come get a life. FGL 4life! ????
John
June 1, 2018 @ 9:45 am
Trigger reading this has made my day, lol.
Jack Williams
June 1, 2018 @ 9:53 am
I think that whistling is close enough for a millennial whoop. Gotta have the millennial whoop.
Kevin Smith
June 1, 2018 @ 10:17 am
Hah! Good one Jack. Not to mention the sesame street lyrics going on here that for some inexplicable reason are splattered on the screen.
Maybe it’s really intended to be parody and we are all missing it’s point? Like a deliberately awful B movie.
Patrick Bluhm
June 1, 2018 @ 10:02 am
The song itself is not bad. It’s certainly better than most of their material. The album will undoubtably be awful. But let’s enjoy the fact that the song isn’t terrible. There’s actually a real musicians playing most of the music and the song. I can appreciate that. I give it a 5/10
albert
June 1, 2018 @ 10:12 am
” Simple” is right .
Coulda called it ” Borefest ” ..or ” Trite ” , or ” Pointless ” or ” Who Cares ”
…..lyrics had to be written by an eight year old…..a dumb one .
These guys and their Hallowe’en get-ups are a real nuisance .
Florida Georgia Strawgraspers …what the hell did the world do to deserve this ?
Tom
June 1, 2018 @ 10:14 am
Isn’t the whistling melody at the beginning from a commercial?
albert
June 1, 2018 @ 10:19 am
I think the whistling is from a dozen commercials and several dozen songs , Tom .
They’ve even ruined ‘ whistling ‘ for us now .
Why isn’t ” Urban whistling ?….Its super – hip isn’t it ?….Wasn’t it ?……
First I wake up to a leaking hot water tank . Now THIS .
Gotta go ………gotta call Phil Philips and give him the heads-up ……..
Zues
June 4, 2018 @ 4:51 pm
I thought the same thing. A Target commercial, maybe… Pretty sure I spent a half hour at Target recently, picking out a new TV, listening to this irritating song on a loop. After buying the TV, I did feel a strange compulsion to check out the fresh spring clothing lines of Target’s Mossimo and Merona. Hold on. Is FGL the genius that writes the subliminal ad songs for Target? Does that explain their popularity? Is that why everytime I hear a FGL song, I want to go to the lobby and buy myself a treat?
Mike Honcho
June 1, 2018 @ 10:17 am
I saw Thompson Square on Fox this morning. The chick had a mohawk and I thought the dudes were FGL. I hate Cuntry Music.
Zues
June 4, 2018 @ 4:52 pm
I’m proud to genuinely say, Thompson who?
ScottG
June 1, 2018 @ 10:23 am
Man these poor guys can’t catch a break. Here they are ditching their drum machine sounding pop to make some authentic Americana type stuff and you still have to criticize.
Just kidding…this is pretty bad. If this didn’t have phoniness written all over it, and the music video wasn’t textbook trying so hard, and if it didn’t have that cliché whistling, and if it didn’t have lyrics like “Then I met you and you met me and all the rest is history,” and if it didn’t have such boring chord progressions, etc, it MIGHT be a 2/10. But it does have ALL of those things.
North Woods Country
June 1, 2018 @ 10:30 am
I found it pleasant, at least. Should put everybody’s children to sleep at night
melancholyjen
June 1, 2018 @ 10:33 am
“… like you’re trying to get laid at your liberal arts college during the first term of the Obama Administration by playing “Wagon Wheel” in an old time string band.”
I’m at work and ugly snorted so hard that one of my staff members asked if I was okay.
Just like putting lipstick on a pig. Except the pig has purpose.
KT
June 4, 2018 @ 9:39 am
From someone who went to a liberal arts college during the first term of the Obama administration.. I snorted too. Lol
Gerald
June 1, 2018 @ 10:39 am
Next thing you know they both grow Stapleton beards and market their album with super high quality drone shots from Colorado and title the album “Rocky Mountain High” and all the songs are about getting stoned in Colorado
Jared S.
June 1, 2018 @ 10:56 am
Oh man, the whistling, the auto-tune, the hand claps, the spelling, the lyrical cliches. This song has it all!
JB-Chicago
June 1, 2018 @ 5:06 pm
I’ve had it with the hand clap shit on way too many songs. It should be banned!!
Gerald
June 1, 2018 @ 7:09 pm
At least there’s no finger snapping. That shit really grinds my gears.
kross
June 1, 2018 @ 11:08 am
if they would have put this song out 7 years ago, I probably would have been on board. Now it just feels contrived and unoriginal.
Sean
June 1, 2018 @ 11:18 am
The whistling intro sounds like a blatant ripoff of Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zero’s “Home.”
Blackh4t
June 1, 2018 @ 12:36 pm
Exactly what I heard straight away. The magnetic zeros should ask for royalties.
I like the song. I mean, it has no substance or talent, but it sounds pleasant. And will sound good played around a campfire trying to get laid at a country festival
CJ
August 7, 2018 @ 1:59 am
Thank you – that has been bugging me for ages and I kept googling “what song does FGL simple sample” and couldn’t believe there were apparently no results!
Austin
June 1, 2018 @ 11:42 am
Here’s the real question. Which would you rather listen to, this or that’s Blake Shelton song: lived it? Dilemmas am I right?
Owen
June 1, 2018 @ 12:20 pm
I lived it is a good song. Idk what you’re talking about
Austin
June 5, 2018 @ 12:30 pm
I can respect you opinion Owen. It certainly isn’t his worst effort. But I just don’t think it’s anywhere close to a good song.
Kevin Davis
June 1, 2018 @ 11:47 am
I happened to be in my car when our local country station did the debut of the single. The dj lady was hyping it, per usual. After just a few seconds, I couldn’t believe how blatantly this rips off Mumford and Sons. I had not seen the promotional art work or video, and that’s even more ridiculous. And why is “simple” being spelled over and over? It’s all just so mindbogglingly lame. We all knew these guys were tools, but this is another level of being a tool.
Marky Mark
June 1, 2018 @ 4:45 pm
Just a thought, but perhaps “…another level of tooldom” would have been more succinct. Also, calling them tools is an insult to the band Tool.
matthew rutledge
June 1, 2018 @ 12:08 pm
At least its a move in a better direction.
Owen
June 1, 2018 @ 12:22 pm
Trigger- what I don’t get is Dierks made the exact same song, same style, yet you gave it a positive review. Woman, amen is possibly even more generic than this and doesn’t include dobro or mandolin.
Clyde
June 1, 2018 @ 1:02 pm
Good point.
Trigger
June 1, 2018 @ 1:21 pm
First off, these are not the “exact same song.” That’s kind of insulting to both. Yes, they both have the Mumford /Lumineers approach, but their both their own animals.
The second difference is the underlying point of the review, which I tried to emphasize. Dierks Bentley’s backgrounds is a bluegrass guy who started in string bands, and has collaborated with The Punch Brothers, etc. If he wants to make a more rootsy record, this is Dierks being Dierks. In the case of Florida Georgia Line, this stuff is completely out of their wheelhouse. It’s not them. It’s disingenuous. That doesn’t make the music bad necessarily, but it does make it inappropriate to them.
Music should be just not just as a standalone, but among it’s peers, and amid the output of the artist. If Florida Georgia Line want to try and salvage their career with more substance, they should take the “Dirt” approach, or do like Tim McGraw did and double down on really good songs. Dressing up in suspenders just comes across as incredibly hokey.
CraigR.
June 1, 2018 @ 1:36 pm
Well FGL’s lack of talent is more apparent here than their usual songs. First, which ever one of them does the singing just flat out can’t sing- even with auto tune. There is no emotion behind it, or direction. And the spelling part is inane. The problem FGL is the same problem they always have. Add a banjo or subtract a drum machine, it doesn’t matter. They are talentless. They lack real emotions, real life, and self awareness. I don’t even think ” Dirt” was a good song. I think people were so shocked it came from them that they praised it. But these sheep in sheep’s clothing are little musical cowards. They started singing because of the fame, not the art. And their musical history is littered with examples of what not to do in country or any other music. And more importantly they don’t seem to care. This change in sound is a clear indication that they will sell any type of snake oil to their fans to reap in the money. That is just blatant theft. Someone should arrest them before they really start leaving lasting harm to country music.
albert
June 1, 2018 @ 2:08 pm
DREAD ON Craig……dead on
albert
June 1, 2018 @ 2:14 pm
…….as I see it , this ( as Craig so rightly states above ) is THE issue with radio country . it is bereft of ANY redeeming qualities …it is soulless and these guys are the poster boys for SOUL-LESS . labels and production has stripped away any semblance of artistic vision , style , direction ,uniqueness , authenticity , character , substance and shelf life . they have completely capitulated to the $$$$ and a market that is not interested in ANY of the aforementioned .
bob
June 1, 2018 @ 2:39 pm
This sounds to me like shitty Blackberry Smoke if that were a thing.
GrantH
June 1, 2018 @ 4:37 pm
Sometimes I wonder if the southern frat-bro types who FGL was trying to appeal to earlier in their career feel betrayed at all by this massive change in their image and sound.
Anthony
June 1, 2018 @ 5:30 pm
Trig, are you sure using words like rehabilitation and salvage aren’t a little premature? This conversation has been had before all of their albums and yet here they are, the most streamed artist in country music, still headlining major shows, and from what I can see are probably gonna be sought after to work with by more mainstream artists. I mean especially if this thing goes to #1 on country radio, forget it they’re gonna be right back off to the races. Awards or not, its just steep verbiage in terms of what kind of shape their career is still gonna be in lol.
Anthony
June 1, 2018 @ 6:03 pm
And don’t get me wrong, I completely agreed before. It very much looked that way. But since then they’ve planted their boots on the main stage by any means necessary to the extent where I really don’t believe they’re going anywhere.
Joseph
June 1, 2018 @ 6:10 pm
The instrumentation is halfway decent, but the lyrics, like all FGL songs are shallower than the water at a splash pad. Plus their voices always sound like shiße. I’d rather listen to a lung cancer inflicted, chain smoking Bob Dylan than those jokers.
Nate
June 1, 2018 @ 7:09 pm
The song isn’t terrible, it’s one FGL song that if it comes on I wouldn’t be like “what is this shit?” and try to change the station in .2 seconds. I’d be more likely to forget it’s them, it’s so generic paint-by-numbers 4-chords crap. But that Instagram line is cringeworthy and pulls me out of the song. It almost makes Trigger’s point for him, when he says this is so far out of their wheelhouse and disingenuous to that lifestyle. Like they’re actively saying, “we know this isn’t us, we used to live a life glamorized by Instagram, but now we’re one of you!” It just comes off as fake and insincere.
Ulysses McCaskill
June 1, 2018 @ 9:18 pm
Bro-Country metrosexuals imitating (poorly) and old-time stringband. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Fuzz
June 2, 2018 @ 1:32 am
Those lyrics were terrible. It’s like old Taylor songs but at least she was 16 when she wrote em.
Thoroughbred
June 2, 2018 @ 3:53 am
Edward Sharpe and the Archaic Zeros
Thoroughbred
June 2, 2018 @ 7:06 am
Moronic Zeros… should’ve used moronic…let’s base our hipster comedy on that adjective instead.
King Honky Of Crackershire
June 2, 2018 @ 7:24 am
The lead singer’s voice is so bad. Everything about it is terrible: the tone, the faux-twang, the phrasing. He’s just a really terrible singer. Why don’t they try giving the other dude a chance? He may not be better, but it’s hard to imagine him being worse.
Dirt Road Derek
June 2, 2018 @ 10:57 am
With the exception of their pop collaborations, I’ve always enjoyed FGL, and I like this track as well as their other new track, “Colorado”. It’s not groundbreaking or a deep thinker, just harmless fun. I need bands like this in my collection. I love Ernest Tubb, Roy Acuff, Hank, Merle, and all the rest, but I also enjoy the occasional catchy FGL song. And besides, it’s nowhere near as offensive to my ears as Brandon Ray’s “Bring your love back”, or Urban’s “Coming Home”. It might not be pure or traditional, but it is country and it does sound like what I expect to hear when I tune in my local country station. I’ll buy the new FGL album and plop it right next to Garth and all the other diverse country artists that make my album collection fun and interesting to flip through.
CountryRoads
June 2, 2018 @ 12:18 pm
FGL couldn’t be further from country, by any measure. Other than that, I agree with your post and suppprt your right to enjoy listening to bubble gum pop. I also have a diverse record collection that spans far beyond country, but I can’t imagine turning to something as soulless, unoriginal and just plain annoying as FGL for that fix. Go buy an original copy of the Cars’ self titled album…..much better to llisten to when you are craving something more poppy and fun. And, your dignity will remain intact while listening to it (ok, I kid, that last part was a little harsh.). : )
Donny
June 2, 2018 @ 11:13 am
Lol at least its better than their other stuff
Dirt Road Derek
June 2, 2018 @ 5:42 pm
When it comes to 80s pop, The Cars were really great, but for my money there was nobody better than Duran Duran. Simon LeBon is a vocal God.
CountryRoads
June 3, 2018 @ 11:36 am
Good call. Simple Minds is also a band that was great….even beyond their one huge hit. You also can’t beat several of the earlier Depeche Mode albums when it comes to 80s synth pop, although they aren’t exactly fun or carefree listening!
Christian
June 2, 2018 @ 11:36 am
It Ain’t Buck Owens, that’s for sure
Aidan
June 2, 2018 @ 11:55 am
If you don’t like it, then don’t listen to it. Simple as that. (See what I did there)
Mike
June 3, 2018 @ 6:13 pm
Wow, Aidan. Your comment is BURSTING with originality!!! Bravo, champ.
Justin
June 2, 2018 @ 1:59 pm
Now I’m reminded that pop in 2012 (Mumford & Sons, Lumineers, etc.) was more country than today’s “country.”
Martha
June 3, 2018 @ 7:04 am
Who wrote this song? Surely it wasn’t these guys because there are words in it that don’t seem to fit in their vocabulary. Words like “epiphany”. You know these two probably don’t even know what that word means, much less use it in a song. “Complicate, overrated, paradise”. These words are too big for them. Somebody else wrote this.
Trigger
June 3, 2018 @ 9:15 am
Florida Georgia Line wrote it with Michael Hardy and Mark Holman.
Q
June 3, 2018 @ 7:11 am
You guys (and the editor) are waay over analyzing things, which ironically kinda validates the theme of the song. If a song has catchy melodies that ppl can sing along, it serves it purpose of entertainment for it intended audience. Most bashing I think are more towards the artist then the song. The same folks dismissing this type of guilty pleasure songs are the same ones that also knows the lyrics to a Backstreet Boy song.
Charlie
June 5, 2018 @ 8:45 am
You have hit on what I call the Chillin’ It conundrum–in that case hating on Cole Swindell for a plain, narcolepsy-inducing song, when in fact taking it easy is the theme of the song.
In this case I’m not sure what to make of FGL calling the string band crowd Simple. Of course that scene has a simple approach to songcraft and style and so forth. And I guess this is an attempt to reflect that in song. But this smacks of a serious identity crisis–like serving a Mojito in a Mason jar.
Mike
June 3, 2018 @ 6:15 pm
I don’t know if anyone remembers the Adult Swim cartoon Frisky Dingo, but FGL would definitely qualify as a reason for Killface to want to destroy the world.
Splitear
June 4, 2018 @ 5:56 am
Mumford and Sons with the lyrical integrity of a children’s picture book. Think what you want about M&S, but their lyrics were fairly intelligent. Just like everything else in mainstream country music these days, the everything is dumbed-down to the lowest common denominator, which lets face it, is pretty damn low 🙂
KansasDansas
June 4, 2018 @ 11:46 am
Country music has become far more about scoring a table at the latest trendy restaurant than a stool at a corner bar. Look back at music videos and album covers for artists like Alan Jackson, George Strait, even Garth (minus the Chris Gaines debacle). What you saw was what you got: cowboy hats, jeans and boots. And that image held steady for the majority of those guys’ careers. That doesn’t mean they didn’t try to evolve as musicians, or throw curveball singles at radio – but image was rarely compromised. Lately, artists seem like confused high school kids trying to fit in whenever, wherever, and however they can. It makes it so difficult to get a clear sense of who they want to be as writers, singers and performers. A genre needs boundaries pushed to evolve – and that can be a great thing. But, at no point should evolution require a complete personal/artistic overhaul. I actually don’t mind this song, because it’s something a little left of center for FGL. I can actually see children singing along like that dreadful “Let It Go” Frozen theme song, because it has an almost nursery rhyme quality to it. But the image facelift makes me think they went out and bought hipster clothes deep in the slums of East Nashville, walked into a writer room and said, “OK, now that we look like Mumford, let’s write something that sounds like Mumford.” Hard to be Mumford when you’re still the same guys in the video for “This Is How We Roll.”
Brandon F
June 5, 2018 @ 7:21 am
Ward Davis (co-writer of Cody Jink’s upcoming song Colorado) had a nice review on Facebook.
“You know what I love about Colorado? The mountains, the rivers and lakes, the sunsets, the people, the memories from when I was a child, and as many from adulthood, The smell of the piney ponderosa air, the cool early morning valley breezes rolling down the slopes.
If I were a songwriter, I might try to think about those things as I wrote. Or I could be a dip-shit and just write this one. There’s more to Colorado than just the weed. You could take all the weed out of Colorado, and it would still be the most magical place on earth. But hey- nice tribute, douchebags.”
Les
June 7, 2018 @ 10:18 am
Still not obvious to you that these guys and their listeners don’t give a damn about your muzzy posturing as a savior/messiah of anything? Dude, the world and all that’s in it unfolds as the world and all that’s in it should. Simple.
Joseph
November 20, 2018 @ 2:18 pm
Spelling out words in a song, especially the TITLE of the song is a big no no and lame/cliche
Just as bad as song talking
These guys just keep pumping generic pop garbage like everyone else