Austin Lets Out a Hipster Gaffaw at Your Country Festival, iHeartRadio
Today it was announced that Austin, TX would be the site for iHeartRadio’s first ever dedicated country music festival, transpiring at Austin’s Frank Erwin Center on March 29th, with a list of top tier headliner talent including Eric Church, Luke Bryan, Jason Aldean, Florida Georgia Line, Lady Antebellum, Carrie Underwood, Jake Owen, Hunter Hayes, and others to be announced. iHeart is the online radio streaming arm of American radio monolith Clear Channel, and rising Clear Channel “country” personality Bobby Bones, who got his Clear Channel start on Austin’s pop station, will serve as host.
There is so much that is ill-conceived about this, I’m not sure where to start. iHeart has been throwing “festivals” for a while now, but their traditional home has been Las Vegas. Clearly iHeart wanted to find an alternative to the obvious selection of Nashville, where they would have to compete with much more well-established country events clogging the civic calendar. But throwing a corporate country event in Austin, especially at that time of the year will be about as popular in Austin as running over a bicyclist in your Hummer.
About all this festival will be good for when it comes to the Austin populous will be as a curiosity for hipsters to oogle at through their Sally Jessy Raphael glasses as they ride their fixie bikes past the spectacle, sipping on raw food smoothies on their way to brainstorming sessions devising ways to defund Monsanto by setting up micro loans to African women and targeted eco-terrorism strikes.
The general Austin, TX population has so little interest in this iHeartRadio lineup, it’s laughable that iHeart can’t even be perceptive enough to add even one or two local names to help dull the pain of such an obviously imported corporate country bill. Kudos to whoever in the local Austin government conned iHeart into thinking that Austin’s east downtown corridor is a destination spot for people who are willing to travel hundreds of miles to hear Jason Aldean sing “1994.” Instead of the garish finery of the Las Vegas strip, Luke Bryan and Florida Georgia Line fans can look forward to legions of homeless peddlers clogging their walking path, an army of construction cranes piercing the skyline in their headlong effort to erect an empire of prefabricated McCondo monstrosities, the 3rd worst traffic snarl in the United States of America, and crumbling fair trade coffee shops oozing with unbathed, deadlocked career students preaching that 9/11 was a conspiracy.
The worst part about iHeartRadio’s country festival might be the timing. Despite whatever best efforts they implement in regards to promotion, locally the event will be dwarfed by South by Southwest the week before, boasting thousands of free concerts, showcasing both local and independent talent, and big national names. South by Southwest is arguably one of the biggest music festivals in the entire world in regards to breadth and the amount of performances that transpire all across Austin over a 5 day period.
And don’t forget that Rodeo Austin also happens the week before, and is featuring its own lineup of big names, including Loretta Lynn, Dustin Lynch, Thompson Square, Chris Young, Josh Turner, Willie Nelson, Eli Young Band, Lee Brice, Scotty McCreery, and Dwight Yoakam. There’s already legions of Austinites that provision up when March comes and never leave the homes because of the nightmare South by Southwest and Rodeo Austin bring to their fair city. The idea that they’ll peek their head out and head downtown just because Hunter Hayes is finally making his way to Austin is quite ripe.
So will the iHeartRadio Country Festival be a colossal failure? Of course not, because they have the backing of the biggest corporate country network in the world to help promote it. Pliable corporate country music fans from all across the country will be more than happy to burn vacation time to see their favorite Budweiser and designer jeans sponsors in one place, edifying them with the finest of Music Row’s formulaic pap filtered through Auto-tuners.
Stock up on cans of Axe Body Spray and rape kits Austin, you’ll need ’em.
January 8, 2014 @ 3:58 pm
Third paragraph is an absolute classic. Hilarious.
This may be your chance to get those long sought after one on one interviews with Luke Bryan and Florida Georgia Line!
January 8, 2014 @ 4:10 pm
Why bash hipsters? They have better music taste than just about any other group of people. If country music is going to be saved, hipsters will be one reason why.
January 8, 2014 @ 4:22 pm
Honestly, I am not bashing hipsters at all here…..well maybe a playful nudge. But what I’m trying to do is paint a picture of what a culture shock it is to see a festival like this setting up shop in Austin, especially during that week. It is so counter-intuitive to everything Austin and an insult to the independent music spirit of the city.
January 8, 2014 @ 7:05 pm
You’re joking, right? Forgive my personal bias, but pretty much EVERYTHING you’re implying here isn’t true for the hipsters I’ve met. If YOU’RE one I don’t mean to make assumptions, but the hipsters I’ve come into contact with have to be the most pretentious little clique with a completely unmerited sense of self-importance that I’ve ever met in my entire life. Yes, they all THINK that they have better taste than everyone else, but that’s only a requirement for being part of the “movement,” not a universal truth. In fact, the only person to ever tell me that I had “objectively bad taste” in music was a hipster, and that was because country is my favorite genre. The rest of the ones I’ve met simply hate country music on principle, regardless of whether it is independent or mainstream. Tell me again how this is helping to save country music? Need a reason to bash hipsters? Self-absorbed, ignorant but under the assumption that they’re intellectuals, liberal regardless of reason, stuck up, conceited, have an ironic idea of irony. How’s that for starters? Again, I don’t know you and what culture you or the people in your life aspire to is your business, but don’t pretend like hipsters are victims.
January 8, 2014 @ 7:08 pm
Oh, I almost forgot: when it comes to art and entertainment, hipsters hate everything regardless of quality unless it’s indie, thus helping them to maintain their “uniqueness” and elite stature among the “normal” people.
January 9, 2014 @ 7:41 am
You’re kinda late to the game Acca, I was bashing hipsters before it was cool…
January 9, 2014 @ 8:40 am
Objectively bad taste. That’s a good one. I wonder what the name of the unit is when they measure good taste. Warhols, maybe?
If you haven’t heard it, check out the Bottle Rockets song Idiot’s Revenge sometime. Here’s a link to the lyrics:
http://songmeanings.com/songs/view/3530822107858650720/
January 9, 2014 @ 3:11 pm
I might have to get the album that this song is on. Thanks for sharing 🙂
January 9, 2014 @ 9:06 am
Well I’m personally not a Hipster, I won’t judge an entire group of people, I certainly have friends who could be described as Hipster. They dress and act retro, wear old clothes, read magazines and listen the radio(NPR). What is more vintage than the classic country sound. I’m sorry a hipster was rude to you but in my experience they are willing to hear new and different things. Once you assure them that “Radiohead is one of the greatest bands ever” and “Bon Iver recording an album in the northwoods of Wisconsin was super cool” I’ve found them much more open to listening to country music.Try converting a fan of Jason Aldean or FGL to country, that is next to impossible, they don’t want anything more from music. I’ve had a lot of luck with hipsters, I’ll play James Hand or Dale Watson and they say “I like this kind of country music”
Also Hipsters support local and live music. I’ve been to country shows and they come just because its at a small venue that has “underground” or “indie” acts play there. I would say the kind of music supported on this website falls into those categories.
We need all hands on deck to save country music, why turn away anyone who might help the cause!
January 9, 2014 @ 10:21 am
Good lord this hipster talk is so damn old. It’s just a sweeping generalization of people. It’s a mindset of “Eww I can look at that person and tell I don’t like them. They ride a bike they must be a douche bag.” You end up doing the same thing you proclaim to hate about “hipsters” and that’s liking or disliking something just because it doesn’t seem to fit into your idea of what is cool/acceptable. All I’m saying is people shouldn’t be so quick to label people. Give the person a chance and after that they are still a douche bag well so be it. You are gonna find those types of people all across the board. The fact is nobody knows what exactly a “hipster” is, but everybody wants to label somebody as one. And, all I know if I didn’t like people for the fact that they aren’t into the same things I am or dressed differently I would miss out on a lot of really great friends.
January 9, 2014 @ 10:38 am
I know you may not be directing this at me (though you may), but again, my point was to illustrate how outside of Austin culture this “country” festival is by showing contrast between Austin “hipsters” and corporate country music fans. They are the complete opposite ends of the spectrum, and that is why it makes it so laughable they decided to throw this thing in Austin.
January 9, 2014 @ 12:29 pm
Nah it wasn”™t aimed at you at all. It seemed to me you were using those stereotypes for juxtaposition.
January 8, 2014 @ 11:39 pm
Hipsters will never save country music. They are primarily into indie rock and hip-hop, not country.
March 27, 2014 @ 4:58 am
idk, back in 2000 I started the first Alt Country Radio Show in Madison WI, it was on a Top 40 Country Station but I had an awesome boss who agreed to give me one hour every Friday night to play…Dale, Willie, The Derailers, Dwight, EmmyLou, Wilco, and so on. It became so popular we added another hour. Whenever I brought an artist to town the shows sold out and the crowd was packed with Madison ‘Hipsters’ … Don’t underestimate them. Just because they don’t buy into corporate fed crap, doesn’t mean they don’t have good taste in music 😉
January 8, 2014 @ 5:14 pm
Off subject here, but sort along the lines as this subject. I was watching Full Throttle Saloon last night and if you have never watched the show it is a reality show about the Full Throttle Bar/Complex located in Sturgis, SD and is only open during the Motorcycle Rally. Last night’s episode was about them spending $100,000 setting up another stage and bar area for the country duo “Big and Rich” to perform. Turns out they only sell 85 presale tickets and maybe 150-200 people show up, when they are trying to sell thousands of tickets. They advertise on billboards, do many radio advertisements, and also have their advertising half-naked biker babes stand out in Sturgis trying to sell the tix but they can’t get anyone to buy them. So it ends up they lose their ass. The only thing they could think of was that even though Big and Rich sell out arenas the duo are just not a big draw for middle age bikers….duh you think? I just thought this was completely fuck’n awesome. Big and Rich even came across as douches on the show.
http://www.trutv.com/full-episodes/full-throttle-saloon/2013236/index.html
January 9, 2014 @ 8:19 am
That is cracks me up. They should know better. If they would have booked classic rock it would have been cheaper and would have been a draw bikers have more class than to like Big and Rich.
January 8, 2014 @ 6:53 pm
Trigger, don’t forget that same day at whitewater amphitheater in New Braunfels is the Merle Haggard show, with Randy and Wade doing their “hold my beer and watch this” as the opening act. I would say that’s on the opposite end of the spectrum from the I heart festival.
January 8, 2014 @ 7:12 pm
Trig, in case you’re interested, there’s a couple of typos:
Hunter HAYES, not Hays. And I assume that you meant 9/11 (the date) as opposed to 911 (the phone number).
January 8, 2014 @ 8:33 pm
That’s annoying. You could have sent him an email.
January 8, 2014 @ 8:56 pm
How’s it annoying? I see people pointing out typos in the comments all the time and I figured it wouldn’t hurt. It certainly wasn’t directed at you so I’m not seeing the problem.
January 8, 2014 @ 8:33 pm
Honestly I bet it works, Austin is loaded with teenagers and Yuppies. It’s an interesting city. There are so many of these yuppies that have moved because in the trendy music scene the house prices have skyrocketed (and it feels so much more crowded now – compared with only a few years ago).
Supposedly Clear Channel is giving away tickets to the festival on over 100 of it’s stations. I guess that’s a good way to load the gun (so to speak).
“Luke Bryan, Carrie Underwood, Jason Aldean, Eric Church, Lady Antebellum, Florida Georgia Line, Hunter Hayes, Jake Owen.. etc.”. I want to vomit. One weird thing about current times is these artists release far fewer albums than those that came before them and they have a far greater number of TV performances because of all the award shows and main stream festival events. I swear I think I saw Carrier Underwood sing “Black Cadillac” five award shows in a row. FGL must have done “cruise” on 10 different award shows. I think the worst of it might have been the teen choice awards (youtube it for a laugh).
It’s really funny to me that the same young generation behind that “occupy Wall Street” moronic crap is the same generation giving Corporate Country and Clear Channel (etc) the power they have. They had big corporations unless there’s a pop country star puppet up front.
I need a beer…
January 8, 2014 @ 9:03 pm
I have no doubt there is a segment of the Austin population that is salivating over this event, and is glad that Austin is finally getting some mainstream acts to play in the city. But I think iHeart isn’t betting on a local draw, but pulling people from around the country. In fact they would probably prefer it. They want superfans of this music that will go crazy and look good on camera.
Austin rarely gets big concerts like this. They usually bypass Austin and play Dallas, Houston, maybe San Antonio, and people from the Austin market must travel to see big acts. One reason is because despite how well-known Austin is, it’s a fairly small market, especially compared to Dallas and Houston. Plus you take that its music fans are fairly independent-minded, and you don’t get a very good draw for big, mainstream acts.
Also, The Frank Erwin center is not the greatest live music venue. It’s not bad, but it’s much smaller than most modern day arenas. It’s 36-years-old, which is a grandad compared to most arenas. So the venue itself is somewhat of a curious pick.
Overall the thing just smacks of Clear Channel: ignore the local flavor of the place you’re going, and just implement the big, popular format. If they were going to have a bunch of big names, but also decided to showcase some local country music talent from Austin or surrounding areas, I might be 100% on board with it. Look at Stagecoach Festival in California. They have all the big names, but also showcase up-and-coming talent. Give Dale Watson and The Whiskey Shivers, or a cool Texas country band a chance on your big, national stage. The way they picked Austin, it’s just some arbitrary spot on the map that has no real meaning.
January 8, 2014 @ 11:45 pm
The vast majority of young people did not support Occupy Wall Street.
Young people are much more conservative on economic issues than you might expect (they definitely lean left on economic issues, but not nearly as much as they do on social issues). Most Millennials have no problem with corporations, and a large number of them are starting small businesses with the hope that they will become big corporations someday.
March 27, 2014 @ 5:08 am
People of my generation 30’s-40’s and younger are paying attention to where there food comes from (GMO’s), or trying to only shop at locally owned business’s, eating from local farms, where there tax money is going, healthcare, and further education (if they can afford it). Also, this is a time in history where the younger generations are overwhelmingly for same sex marriage, legalizing pot, and woman’s rights.
January 8, 2014 @ 11:48 pm
It is also important to note that the primary target of Occupy Wall Street was not corporations in general, but specifically Wall Street for bringing down the economy and destroying jobs. At least the music industry has not done anything that harmful.
January 9, 2014 @ 8:13 am
From what I understand, the only way to get a ticket to this show is to win one from the various iHeartRadio country music affiliates across the country. So, long stroy short, there will be some Austin locals who attend, but apparently most will be brought in from throughout the country. This is the same method that is applied in order to be able to attend the iHeartRadio festival that’s held in Las Vegas each year. You’ve got to win your way in.
January 9, 2014 @ 8:16 am
I predict massive failure on this deal Austin is NOT the market for this. Dallas sure Austin not so much,. there will be massive noney lost on this. Which makes my freaking day. I hate your guts clear channel you have played a large role in destroying local country radio all over the country.
January 9, 2014 @ 10:16 am
Clear Channel has spent so much time and money promoting iHeartradio but I literally don’t know anybody who uses it. The only people I’ve met who recognize the”iHeartradio” name think it’s a music festival, not an app. Clear Channel has stated that iHeartradio is crucial to their future but I think they are failing miserably at competing with Pandora and other online radio groups.
January 9, 2014 @ 10:54 am
Well Randy Rogers Band and William Clark Green are at the the Nutty Brown in Austin on the 28th. Maybe everybody will go to it instead and be too hungover to make to the bro/pop country throwdown haha. That would be my plan anyways. Too bad I live in Alabama
January 9, 2014 @ 11:29 am
Merle Haggard is in New Braunfels on the same night, the 29th, with Randy and Wade doing their “hold my beer and watch this” as the opening act. Hopefully a bunch of people will make this show also, but I know a ton of people will go to the bro country festival at the Erwin Center.
January 9, 2014 @ 1:27 pm
I’ve been to the ” Hold my Beer and watch this” show twice in Little Rock at the Rev Room. It’s truly awesome. Been to a lot of shows and wade and Randy’s acoustic show is the best I’ve seen. But, I really enjoy hearing somebody just sing and play acoustic. I have so much fun and it’s very entertaining. I wish they could somehow record it and make a live record.
January 9, 2014 @ 11:56 am
http://tasteofcountry.com/jason-aldean-burn-it-down-2014-tour-dates/
This has to be on the best of 2014 tours list for sure…..Jason Aldean, Florida Georgia Line and Tyler Farr. Woooohooooo!!!
January 9, 2014 @ 9:03 pm
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…
January 10, 2014 @ 7:23 am
I may vomit. “Burn it down” – I wish someone would burn down Jason Aldeans ego. Glorifying drink and driving and too arrogant to take his hat off even when singing the national anthem.
You’d think he makes enough money to afford jeans without holes in them and shirts with buttons. And, barf, the pointless leather wrist bands and that idiotic wallet chain.
He’s a middle aged guy with children (and a man that cheated on his wife). All that and the whole industry is behind him, even giving him the hosting job of the CMT awards. Ugg. Ugg. Ugg.
January 10, 2014 @ 11:04 am
I love it. Sounds like Austin could be Brooklyn Southwest! Can I get a kale salad with a half caf macchiato there?
January 10, 2014 @ 11:39 am
I do like my Budweiser beer and a good pair of jeans…
January 12, 2014 @ 6:14 pm
Wait a minute, Florida Georgia line has fans?
March 26, 2014 @ 9:43 pm
I know you wrote this in January, so it’s a weird coincidence, and I don’t want to be the “touchy-feely” guy in the room, but the hummer/bicycle reference may come off as a bit insensitive right now…
March 27, 2014 @ 6:10 pm
In less than 48 hours’ time, this error of Clear-Channel Communications will go down. I don’t have cable, but I still would like to give the telecast on C.M.T. (Cock Master Television) the MST3K/Rifftrax treatment, if you know what I mean: riff on it for all it’s worth.
March 28, 2014 @ 10:46 pm
All this yap yap and nobody has mentioned that this concert sold
Out on 10 minutes….. ya. . No demand !?!
March 28, 2014 @ 10:52 pm
Actually I explained above exactly why I thought it would sell out, despite the lack of LOCAL attention given to the lineup, and the lack of demand among Austin residents:
“So will the iHeartRadio Country Festival be a colossal failure? Of course not, because they have the backing of the biggest corporate country network in the world to help promote it. Pliable corporate country music fans from all across the country will be more than happy to burn vacation time to see their favorite Budweiser and designer jeans sponsors in one place, edifying them with the finest of Music Row”™s formulaic pap filtered through Auto-tuners.”